last days in kenya.

Today is just a rough day.
We only have one more day left in Msambweni. I woke up today with a bad attitude about being here and feeling like we’re not going to affect anyone in 2 days. We prayed this morning about our day and I prayed especially about healing. God has given me that word about outreach in general. Healing will come. I also asked for eyes to be opened to the pain that people suffer around us. Welp, my heart is broken. And I have no solution to anything that I’ve discovered today. Nothing. It’s so hard to watch someone cry, and have absolutely no solution for them. All I can do is pray for them. I hate the injustice that happens daily, and no one knows. No one cares enough to solve the problem. Or they’re like me, and have no solution to it.
The school has started back up at action ministry. I didn’t help out in the classroom today, and I think that was God having mercy on me. I was there during their recess and I almost went insane. The kids are so horribly mean to each other. Bullying breaks my heart. There’s one little boy here named macongo (not sure if that’s how you spell it) and he has cerebral palsy. The kids are so mean to him. And they just don’t know any better, because the parents don’t parent here. I’m just frustrated because I don’t know what to do. We’re leaving in 2 days. What the heck can I do in the next 2 days?!
At one point I had go and pick macongo up from the ground because he was lying on the ground and the kids were surrounding him, mocking and shoving him. The injustice in the situation is way too much. My heart is broken for these kids. They don’t know any better, but they need to be taught better. How to love each other, how to treat other.

I’m lost today. I’ve just been praying, wondering what I can do. And then I realized that’s the wrong question. It’s not what I can do. It’s never what I can do. What can God do? How can His glory be brought to this place? So even though I know that’s what I need to be asking, I still want to fix it. The problem with the kids is something that just needs to be taught every day, consistently. It’s not something we can just teach them tomorrow and then leave. True discipleship is not teaching once and then leaving them with the information, alone. And I guess that’s something I’m struggling with today too. How do we have true discipleship to everyone here when we’ve only been here a month? And we leave soon.

My mind is all over the place today, and there’s not much rhyme or reason. I know this is just a rambled mess.
I know God is doing a lot in me. That’s what I’m holding onto right now. And I’m excited for change that has happened while we were here. And Nicaragua will be amazing.

So as much as i would love to upload some pictures onto here, it's just not possible here. I'll just have a lot when i get home!
love you guys! :)

 

 

life in kenya.

Isaiah 61:1

"The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me,

because the Lord has annointed me to preach good news to the poor.

He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness

for the prisoners..."

For the first 2 weeks I was here, all i could do was wonder why I was here. It's hot. Sweaty. Completely overwhelming. And the first time I got onto a matatu (14 passenger van that really has over 20 passengers that they use as public transportation) i thought i was going to die. But then i got back from the bush (more on that later) and saw our African castle. And i just got an overwhelming love for this place.

We are here to DO Isaiah 61:1. And although i'm realizing we may not see the impact that we have here, we are making a difference through Jesus. God has done an incredible work in our team alone. We are becoming more unified each day. Sometimes I'll look around at everyone at the end of the day while we're eating dinner and i can't believe how it worked out that we're all here together.

My week in the bush:
Oh man. It was incredibly hard. It was just 4 of us from my team that went with a church in Mombasa. The trip was over Christmas, So not only was i already away from my home on christmas, i was away from my home in africa as well. However Christmas day changed my entire outloook in life. I preached on christmas day, and although i just gave a typical christmas message, i had a good time.I also decided to get over myself and move on from being homesick and pathetic. One thing that comforted me the whole time i was in the bush was that i was called there. No one asked me to go. I volunteered. And if God hadn't told me to, i wouldn't have volunteered myself.
The bush taught me obedience. Patience. Love. And also, that sharing a squattie with someone bonds you for life. :)

So yeah, i miss my family and friends. But i sincerely love this place. The specific village we're in, Msambweni, desperately needs hope and light. The kids neeed parents who know how to parent. And the people just really need to know about Jesus and His life.

This past week we've been doing sunday school in the morning with the kids and then painting in the afternoon. Someone on our team designed the paintings for the school at blessed camp and that's what we've been working on since i've been back from the bush. I really enjoy what we do.
I'm so blessed to be here. The people are so beautiful, and some of the most welcoming people i've ever met. Everywhere we go, if the kids aren't saying "Mazungu!", they're saying "Caribu!"
*Mazungu means white in swahili. baha.
caribu means welcome.

I know i'm come home a different person. My eyes have been opened to the world. Jsut being in this small corner of Africa has completely changed my outlook on life. I would love to come back to Action ministry in 5 years and see how they're doing. They prayed consistently for a team like ours.are quite literally an answer to prayers. And I reallly think we're only laying the foundation for them. I feel like this minstry will explode in the next 5-10 years. Life is beautiful here. With all my love to everyone. Know that i miss you guys, but i'm right where i'm supposed to be. Next adventure, Nicaragua!!
 P.s HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

*prayer requests
-strength, endurance, energy for our team
-hope, light and restoration for Msambweni

LOVELOVELOVE